Tosha Silver It’s Not Your Money Discussion

The Crown Jewels 7/9/2019


I certainly recognized the 3 stages in my life and the ‘crown jewels’.   The first stage is living entirely in your ego or 3rd dimension as some folks call it.  Been there done that and hate it.  The second stage is when you begin to realize the first stage isn’t working and you begin to hand some stuff over to the Universe.  I love doing that.  Ask me about my ‘to do’ list.  How much do I check off & how much does the Universe?  Third stage is a place where the Universe/God acts through you.  Love to be there 100%.  The Crown Jewels are experiencing NONGRASPING, DETACHMENT, and SURRENDER.  Just got over NONGRASPING working on DETACHMENT. SURRENDER = offering, which I do over & over. I’m keeping in mind, “… the soul is hell bent on freedom.”  I’m remembering I was the ‘old soul’ in my family.

The Forgotten Inner Kid 7/1/2019


As I read this chapter I found myself saying, “Inner child work, I don’t sense anything.  Could it be because years ago I did lots of inner child work and she’s all grown up?”  I took my time reading through this chapter.  I was so convinced that my inner child work was complete that I didn’t even record the meditation much less do it.  I was sad that this week would go by with no epiphanies no soul searching.  Oh well.  While taking a great bike ride I began to sense an inner child around.  How silly.  Then I realized children are silly.  From there memories flooded my mind.  Within moments I recognized this chubby rejected pre-teen.  Then the real fun began.  This turned out to be the a momentous chapter.

Energetic Clearing 6/17/2019


This was another fun chapter.  I found myself continuing to clear out more clutter.  And I thought I was someone with little or no clutter.  The thing Tosha calls ‘Spanda’ really works.  I would no more finish one area than I would have the intuition or ‘Spanda’ of exactly what area to declutter next.  As she says it does feel good and without having any obvious sensations you can sense new things being invited in.  I loved cord removal exercise and was amazed at the visuals I got.  I knew who the central person would be but the following events and people were so surprising yet I knew exactly why.  The most  astounding consequence of all this was 2 really creative ideas began to take form to replace old stagnant ideas.

Diving Even Deeper 6/10/2019


This chapter was called “Deepening” appropriately so considering it’s all about going deeper into the 5 steps.  I loved this chapter.  I especially loved “Old Soul Abundance” section.  I’ve known for most of my life that I am a very old soul so this grabbed me.  I resonated with the statement that, “if you are, chasing after abundance can be fruitless and exhausting because you were born to align with Love’s will, follow the Tao and serve something beyond the ego.”  Whew, made me feel SOOO much better.  And then to hear, “You’re actually here to learn to open and stop blocking the Flow.”  I heard myself saying, “I’m in!”


When it came time to continue revisiting The Abundance Prayer I had something unusual happen and remarkably my partner had the same thing occur.  I realized that if I have instructions on what to do I’m fine and happy and feel as if I’m open and doing and accomplishing.  CHECK. √.  If I don’t there is stillness.  I’m lost.  I discovered I’ve spent a lot of time lost.  You’d think it would be a peaceful state, stillness, but for me there is an underlying uneasiness as if I’m missing something, not hearing something and not doing something.  The good news is this state passed pretty quickly.


The second place I loved was, I know this is crazy; Cleaning Your Space.  I am not a person who clutters but there are a few old boxes that need to be opened, that is if I can do it without sneezing to death.  There are also some other spots ….   What really kicked in for me as I continued cleaning is the inner pull, “Spanda.”  You can’t make this stuff up.  I actually was physically and intuitively pulled to each place to clean.  As I would finish one thing the next place to clean would automatically pop into my mind.  I loved it.  If I was unable to get to the next spot to clean it would remain on hold in my brain.  This sounds annoying but it wasn’t at all.  It is like wearing black and having people ask if you’ve lost weight.  Just works.


I began using the God box.  No results in on that yet.


Had an eye-opening experience with section The Pleasure of Receiving.  I’ll cover that in a separate blog.

What an adventure without having to get on a plane!

Diving Deeper 6/3/2019


 I decided on the last day of practicing Chapter 2 to go out on a limb and buy a scratch lotto ticket just for fun.  This is something I rarely if ever do.  You probably know the answer, as Tosha puts it I received a “boon” and won $70.  Treating my partner to dinner out!  Actually, the most pervasive experience I had this week was relief.  Relief that prosperity was something I didn’t have to deal with now.  A second emotion about mid-week that I experienced was a slight sense of nostalgia about my teens & twenties.  The emotion of nostalgia was fleeting and left me wondering about the paths I’ve chosen.  Then I cleaned another area of the house and a flood of nostalgia about unmet goals washed over me.  Whew glad that stuff is gone!

I did realize that I had forgotten the last step.  I’ll dive in and say “It’s easy for me to receive” multiple times a day in week 3.  Receiving is a challenge for me in that I do feel open but then simultaneously judge myself good if I receive from others (like phone calls) and lacking if I don’t.  This is something I’ve just noticed in the last few months.


Power of a Prayer?

I’m taking Tosha Silver’s course that goes along with her new book It’s Not Your Money.  She asks you to take each chapter and do what she prescribes for one week and then move on to the next chapter.  My blog each week will reflect the insights and events that have happened in my life that occur because of what I have learned or experience from reading each chapter.

Chapter one is titled “A Total Relief.” 

I have to admit that I have concerns about money, however there are larger concerns in my life.  It’s the idea that if you have enough money, and you are powerful enough to create it then why isn’t it yours? That idea grabbed me.  Most books & courses promise to deliver that power.  Now I’m told the money isn’t mine, how about the power? 

She introduces the “Full Abundance Prayer” in chapter one.  It’s a good thing I read her first book and loved it because reading that I have to say a prayer everyday rattles my core beliefs.  The strange thing I discovered in week one is that the prayer seemed to float around me and not sink in as I would have expected.  My partner is doing this with me & he noticed the same thing.  Then on the last day a crazy thing happened.  I love crazy unexpected things.  I up and did something really generous; I sent off a cherished book and along with it a generous text to a friend.  Ironically, I haven’t heard anything back from my friend.  This is something I’ll follow in the next weeks.  In the past it would have been highly unlikely I would have done something like this.  I was filled with a sense of abundance, why not share it?  I realized this came directly from the prayer of abundance I was reading and saying each day.  The whole sense of this chapter is subtlety.  I’m not used to subtlety.  I’m used to being hit over the head with an idea, loudly.  I’m used to ‘efforting’ and testing myself to make sure I have the understanding.  Gone.  Absolutely gone.  This was so simple I hardly noticed it.  It just happened.  Can it be that easy?  Stay tuned for Chapter 2;